Nerves When Starting Something New

Starting something new can bring an equal amount of nerves and excitement all mixed up within the same moment. We may have an anxiety that comes from the unknown. However, it’s always exciting to try something new because it could bring a new perspective. Positive or unexpected results may occur as a result.

I began English tutoring for a seven years old girl. I’ve had a lot of experience teaching kids this age when I was a teacher in Seoul. Kids can be a lot of fun to work with and it helps a great deal if you are quick on your feet, flexible, and have a deal of patience. However, kids are quite unpredictable.

Beginning from the first tutoring session is always interesting and exciting because it’s a time in which you first get to know each other and begin to establish a new relationship. It can prove to be a bit challenging because there isn’t an established routine yet. It’s an opportunity for us to be in the moment - to learn about each other and ourselves when we are meeting for the first time and interacting.

The most important thing is to relax as much as possible. When you are getting paid to tutor or provide a service, (such as photography) it’s ideal to remain relaxed. While nervousness may come up, it’s best to learn to be fine with that, too. However, nerves are able to be calmed through a process of understanding - not through suppressing or faking that you are not nervous.

If you look at the big picture, a single moment doesn’t define who we are. We can make a mistake, do something silly, or embarrass ourselves. However, those moments don’t define who we are as people. When we develop a confidence through understanding who we are, and how a single performance isn’t what constructs our character, then we’re able to get a grip on what makes us nervous and why it isn’t something to worry about.

Nervousness often happens because we feel that if we mess up, we’re going to look like a failure, or like a bad person. It’s ok to look bad; nobody is perfect. Worrying about being nervous or looking stressed is only going to compound the problem. We shouldn't allow ourselves to be controlled by nervousness because being nervous literally offers no benefits to help us perform better.

There is a difference between excitement and nervousness, although they may feel similar. If you find yourself being nervous, take the time to work through what the worst possible thing is that could happen. When you finally come to the worst possible outcome, ask yourself why it would be bad if that happened. If you imagine the worst possible scenario and you understand that it still doesn’t define you, then you understand how safe you are. Our identity isn’t based upon temporary moments; it’s built upon a belief in understanding our values.

If you feel nervous, don’t beat yourself up. Just take the time to understand who you are, what your worth is, and that it’s ok to be nervous or look nervous. You are still a valuable person who cannot be defined within a single experience. The less power you give to fear, the less control it will have over you.

For further related reading, please check out: Creative Calm