The Island

It’s easy to simply want to disconnect from all the annoyances, stress, and responsibility of keeping up with friends, family, society, etc. Every time I log on to Facebook, it usually doesn’t take longer than three or four posts to find political statements, fights against inequality, and an over-sharing of personal information. While there’s nothing wrong with supporting good causes and believing in making this world a better place, sometimes the efforts result in finger pointing, blame, and a lack of productivity.

To be an island and retreat may seem increasingly desirable with the additional overstimulation of technology and fear mongering of the news on top of our on daily responsibilities. However, there’s ways to overcome the temptation of solitary living, which results of stagnancy. Life is better when lived with others, as contrary as that may feel at times.

While we can’t choose our family, to a certain degree (in-laws being somewhat of an exception), we can choose our friends wisely. Having a few very close friends holds more value than being popular to many people who don’t know you. The latter holds the risk of “feeling alone with everyone.” A good friend isn’t a person who loves to chat about TV shows, gossip, and mutually rant about things you hate. A good friend is someone who cares about you as a person and is willing to be serious just as readily as they are willing to joke around with you.

A good friend can pick up on the same page with you upon the next meeting – even if it’s been months or years. Quality friends aren’t concerned about spending money in comparison to your wellbeing. Quality friends listen to you and make you feel welcomed.

When I was younger, I made the mistake of bending myself in order to make friends. I tried to fit a mold, by being funny and likeable however I felt was suited so that I felt accepted. It was a big mistake, but the lesson was learned. We all learn different lessons at different times, no matter how silly they may seem. The best thing about making friends is that the process is natural; it doesn’t require a specific technique – only that you be yourself. Of course, having care, appreciation, and love goes a long way into making that possible.

We’re all a bit weird – that’s what’s ironic about friendship and people. We feel connected with people who have a unique personality and feel comfortable within that uniqueness. While we may feel pressure to conform to some standard, that very conformity denies us authenticity that deprives us of the friendship we crave. Be yourself and love – the right people will find their way in.

For further related reading, please check out: Continuity.