Two of a Kind

Best friends can be found in all walks of life. My three best friends were actually found during three very different stages in my life: one during my elementary, almost kindergarten years, one during high school, and the other shortly after I had graduated high school. I’ve met a lot of people in my life - some funny, some entertaining, some very knowledgeable, but there is a certain fire that connects you more deeply to certain people than others.

I’m the kind of guy who likes to spend quality time with a few friends rather than being surrounded by lots of people who I’m familiar or friendly with. Personally, I don’t like the idea of sharing chitchat with someone for a period of time, only to find that person is out of my life the next day. While those conversations and moments may bring some unexpected knowledge, understanding, or experience, I really prefer to be able to put my roots down somewhere, establish a connection, and have a history to look back upon with my friends.

On another note, men often don’t think of women as best friends and vice versa (especially if the relationship has become romantic). However, people shouldn’t be quick to compartmentalize a relationship into a pre-existing box or category simply because it seems convenient for them to do so. Many people are lucky to marry their best friends.

While I believe every friendship holds its own unique benefits and values, a best friend is a person in which you can be 100% honest with at any point in time. They aren’t going to judge you, shame you for making some mistakes, or kick you when you’re down– they just simply listen because they genuinely care and want to help.

To pretend like we care about someone’s cares, needs, or problems is a big mistake. While this may seem obvious, a lot of people will do this if there is some ulterior motive. Perhaps it’s a boss we want to “care” about in order to get a raise. Or more applicably to men, maybe it’s an attractive woman one could pretend to care for - just the sake of getting romantically closer. Most people know fake. Unless someone is a professional actor and practices faking emotions as a lifestyle – most people are going to pick up on subtleties and the energy put off. Often times, it’s not even consciously picked up on, it’s just how we’re built to understand interactions.

For further related reading, please check out: Something New For You.